“We write to taste life twice, in the moment and in retrospect.”
– Anais Nin
“My inspiration tends to come from two words. The two most important words to a writer: what if?”
– Beth Revis
A random and yet intriguing thought just hit me. Many a year ago, when I used to live in Arizona, I used to venture to this place called Fox & Hound. When I went out, it was usually my friends and I venturing to Fox & Hound, which was a Sports Bar that featured pool tables, dart boards and other games, decent food and good music.
Back then, I remember seeing (and then meeting) a guy that always sat in the corner, with his laptop, that was always writing. I always wondered how he, or anyone else really, could be writing on a Friday night, Saturday or even Sunday night, when there was so many other fun things to do. Of course, fun is relative, and what might be enjoyable to one person, might not be to another. He was friendly, and we talked from time to time and played pool, but he usually just wrote.
Fast forward to current times, it’s kind of ironic that that’s exactly what I do nowadays. I just venture on Friday and occasionally Saturday nights to the same place, because I know that not only is the music great, the vibes are awesome, but knowing the staff helps a lot. Finding a place where you find kinship in sure helps when you’re just trying to get work done or help pass the time perhaps. Now I I think I get how that guy might have felt, whereas then I did not.
While I don’t mind meeting people, and even used to go out of my way to try and meet them, I’ve found comfort in just being by myself and let life lead me where it may. I have no problem with that at all. I do really enjoy meeting people, or having good times where I go to write, but really, my main goal’s definitely writing. That’s what I go there for, and that’s what I usually do. I’m glad I was able to knock out more than 9 hours of writing over the weekend over both days, which was awesome because it was the first weekend in many years that I literally was by myself and could do anything I could do, and yet I chose to write.
I’m exhausted of trying to build relationships, acquaintances, friends, trying to get to know people of all types and so on, with no significant reciprocation taking place. If I was never one for superficial relationships in the past, I’m even less so now. I value time way to damn much for me to do something I don’t find enjoyment in or find meaningful in some way. It’s not that I’m not willing to put effort in meeting people, it’s just that I usually put a significantly more amount of effort than the other person, irrespective of whether they are male or female really, but that’s the thing. The right people that become friends will make the friendship seem ‘effortless’ (to use a horrible analogy). What I mean by that is that you just click. That doesn’t mean you don’t argue or everything’s perfect, not at all. It’s just that it’s like you’re both kind of along for the same rollercoaster ride and are just there, along for the ride sort of.
Because of all those reasons and others, I just find solace in being comfortable enough to just go, do my thing, get pizza and drinks, and just write.
Never in a million years did I think I would ever become “that guy” that would just go out on a Friday or Saturday night, not to have a good time, but just to go and follow his passion. I just love writing so much that’s what leads most of my actions. Boy do things change! But I’m okay with that. Writing is part of of me now, it’s what drives me and I do enjoy doing it to an extent I never thought I would honestly. It also helps because the place is fun, and it’s the only place I’d be comfortable taking a laptop on a weekend. The places in downtown here just give you askance glances and the vibes are way different if I want to just do my thing. Not that the places aren’t fun if you want to grab drinks and have a good time, they’re definitely fun. I sometimes do lunch and play pool while writing, but that’s it. There are lots to do and different types of places as well.
But if I want to write? Yeah, none of the places there feel comfortable enough for me to just walk up with my work bag, order drinks and food, and get to work. But that’s cool though, not every place is ever going to have what suits you best, or what you enjoy. I’m just glad that I was able to find a place where I can knock out a significant amount of work, while still being able to enjoy good vibes and the atmosphere.
I do wonder how that guy is doing, and whether he’s still writing there. And if he is, what he’s writing about. That would be one hell of a conversation if we ever crossed paths again.
Who knows though, maybe one day in the future I find another place that I enjoy writing at, but at least I know that need not be the case for the time being.
Noctis Blackburn is an author, bibliophile, writer, poet, dreamer, star gazer, autodidact, logician, researcher, lover of life, Carmel Macchiatto addict, and more.
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